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Contact Capristo Live at
capristolive@googlemail.com

Capristo Live – The Overview

This thing has grown and if I have my way, it’s going to keep growing, so to aid in the posts, here’s a brief but extensive rundown.

I. The Introduction

1. Early Years
2. Growing Up
3. Exchange
4. College
5. Co-ops
6. Germany – The Return 11-2005
7. Closing

II. What Is Capristo

III. This Frank Guy

1. 26.09.2007 Last of the Nice Guys
2. 22.08.2007 Falling in Love - Hard on the Knees
3. Frank the Mentor?
4. Frank's Personality
5. Frank's Type of Girl
6. 02.09.06 Scouting
7. 20.2.06 Reviewing the Situational Past
8. 14.2.06 Glimpse on Politics
9. Dec. 05 Material
10. –Who is this Frank Guy –

IV. Times I'll Never Forget

V. Nicknames

VI. Quotes

1. People I Know
2. Famous People
3. Movie Quotes
4. Random Stuff
5. My Quotes

VII. Something Serious

1. Education 24-06-2007
2. Love & Relationships, Relationships & Love 14-06-2007
3. Retiring the Breeze 27-02-2008
4. The Good Old Days 17-05-2007
5. It's Not All About the Benjamin's
6. There Go My Heroes 26-01-2007
7. My Look Back on the Attack 11-09-06
8. Following Through 19-08-06
9. Punks, Drunks, Shit Like That
10. Homesickness for the times gone by
11. Scouting – The Insight

VIII. The Poetic Side of Things

1. The Disease of Love
2. A Way to Start the Day, The Night Before
3. Love & Racing
4. Racing

IX. Some Comedy

a. The People Triangle
b. The F-Density Curve
c. If a Capristo were a Car...
d. Morning Wood
e. The F-Bomb
f. Prom Queen
g. Metals/Plastic, Men/Women
h. Breasts, Mans Greatest Obsession
i. Shopping Traffic

X. Frank's Movies

Movies with Frank in them:
1. Back Road Driving with the 325i
2. Autobahn Driving with the 325i
3. Wear Sunscreen - Henderson Scout Camp Reservation 2001
4. Home - Around Maryland, 2007
5. Frank Racing Down Under - Formula SAE/Student Australasia 2002 (Slideshow)

Frank's Favorite Movies

XI. Current Events

23.11.2008 Another Couple Months
27.09.2008 FSG 2008, Another Wedding & the Japan Trip
27.07.08 The Move, The Crash & The Trip Home
12.05.08 Changing of the Seasons
09.03.08 March Already
28.01.08 Return of the Capristo

XII. Capristo Live - The Best of Photography

XIII. Current Events Archive 2007

14.10.07 Wake Me Up When September Ends
19.08.07 Another Flashback
02.09.07 Another Day, Another Dollar
19.08.07 FSG - Formula Student Germany
29.07.07 Long Time No See Dr. C
23.06.07 The Long Story about a No Brainer Decision
13.05.07 Still Alive and Kicking
18.04.07 Holding On
31.03.07 The Detroit Trip & The Last Month
25.02.07 Frank's Future
04.02.07 February Already
10.01.07 From The Terminal at JFK

XIV. Current Events Archive 2006

25.12.06 The Christmas Edition
10.12.06 Mr. 247
26.11.06 Keeping Busy As Usual
03.11.06 Touring Bavaria with Pam
15.10.06 Edel Praktikant - The Noble Co-op
03.10.06 Wake Me Up When September Ends
17.09.06 A Doggy Dog World
02.09.06 3 Weeks of Madness and Fun
13.08.06 Blues Night in Schweifurt, Trying to get Frank a Woman
07.08.06 A Little Sad
05.08.06 Live from Southern France, The Rents Visit Till Then
22.07.06 More Kiliani, The Großglockner Experience, Saying Good-Byes
08.07.06 Kiliani and a Run Down on Life at the Moment
01.07.06 Indiana Capristo – The Mexico Expidition
24.06.06 More WC, Music Festival, Work
10.06.06 The Start of World Cup, Weindorf, Road Trip to Zürich
21.05.06 The Bentley Visit
07.05.06 Basic Stuff
29.04.06 Hockenheim Vintage Weekend, Shuttle Party, Frank the Mack
19.04.06 Bowling, Something Serious added
24.03.06 Soccer, Shot Down, Work
10.03.06 Days of Insanity, Macking, Skiing & Bros Reunited
22.02.06 Olympics, Random Thoughts Added
14.02.06 V-Day Babble
05.02.06 Recalling New Years

XV. Current Events Archive 2005

30.12.05 A Look Back on 05
27.12.05 A Scrooged Christmas
15.12.05 Chinese, Arm Wrestling and more German
06.12.05 Chillin with Basti
26.11.05 Thanksgiving 05
22.11.05 Stauner Eck
21.11.05 Dad Sold the Stratus “Merlot” and “Pepe”
19.11.05 Going Low Key
15.11.05 Officially Releasing the Website
05.11.05 Recalling Honky Tonk

Introduction:

I was born in Oneonta, NY, USA and grew up in the small town of Maryland in NY's central leather stocking region. I am the oldest of three, and have a brother Anthony and sister Bethann. Our parents are all you could ask for and more. That's us at the kid sister's graduation. She's the smartest one, top in her class, but I think Tony and I raised more hell over the years.

The Early Years:
I have known my best friend Orrin since our diaper days. We have shared many adventures over the years.




I grew up playing in our 5.75 acre /2.3 hectare back yard and as I got older, the surrounding area. The hills were great for sledding and racing pedal cars down, but my first means of going faster were cross country skis. We used to jump on the ice in the creek in the winter, build dams in the summer, Crayfish hunting in the larger stream near by.

Growing Up:
I spent all of my K-12 years at Schenevus Central School. I played trumpet in the band, played soccer and baseball in middle school and kept playing baseball till I graduated. In those years, I was also active in Scouting. Some think you're crazy, to go out in the middle of winter, pitch a tent and not have anywhere to go inside. I find it one of the most rewarding things to do, to leave the TV, to go out in the fresh air, play cards and eat around a campfire. I spent 4 amazing summers working as an instructor in that time period and 2 more later on. I met a lot of good people. Joe, my brother and I would spend the second half of our high school days going to school dances, playing pool, going bowling and making trips to Crossgates Mall in Albany. Some of my crowning achievements were graduating Regents with Honors and receiving my Eagle Scout Award.

Exchange:
While most people were getting ready to go off to college, I was getting ready to risk it all and go into the unknown. I was going to be an exchange student in Augsburg, Germany. Of all the risks I've ever taken, this one has paid off the most. Mind you, I didn't speak a word of German before I left. I learned it the best way possible, by doing it. I met Melanie N. in my first week and we started trading letters after that. We became great friends and I'm happy to say she still helps me to improve my German.

My first host family was Petraks. It was interesting at first, cause Rainer's English was on par with my German - nonexistent. I owe it to him that I got the chance to kayak in the canal used for the 72 olympics, which was only half a mile down the road. We had a good understanding on things. I had the chance to revisit my childhood obsession of steam trains when we went to Nordlingen on a steam train. The model train layout he has in the attic is one of the most impressive things I've ever seen. We also had a good time playing trumpet together. I played a lot of hands of spades with Martin, Miriam and Renata when we had dinner at her place. My host sister Melanie was great. Having just come back from Argentina, she understood what I was going through. We were the same age and it was fun to hang out with her. She was a big help when it came to reading Melanie's letters and trading them back and forth would have been a lot harder without her, as I was in a different school than them, reading even harder. I would go to her with manuscripts of translation with huge blank spots in the beginning. We had a great Christmas together.

It's standard practice to switch host families as a Rotary Exchange Student. After New Years, it was time for my first change. I went to Königsbrunn to live with Nietsches. By this point in time my German was getting fluent and it was easier to get to know Rita, Julia, Günter and Christopher. I learned the most schwäbisch German I ever have from Günter. Rita always made sure I had everything I needed. Julia, Christopher and I would watch Stefan Rabb and laugh till no end. Julia was great and gave me all the advice on girls that you can't get from your bros at a time when I needed it the most. We had a lot of fun going out to the movies with the Königsbrunn crew. We went skiing for a total of 10 days in the Austrian Alps. I have never skied in so much powder in my life. The nights up in the hut were filled with games, and we were always the first out on the slopes. They were great in hosting my family when they came to visit, to which we are forever grateful (not the right word, but my English is getting poorer).

When May rolled around, it was time for Koren and I to swap families and I went to live with Prillers. Sebastian is the forth generation owner of the family brewery, the largest in the city, with the younger Sebastian (Basti) getting ready to make it five. Silvia was always very helpful and it was interesting to discuss political/social issues with her and Sebastian. Dominikus(Mini) and Hanna made sure that my social life didn't suffer. We would watch the Simpsons, sometimes with a 20 piece nugget and BBQ sauce in hand. It was a gorgeous summer and we frequented the beer gardens. Silvia, Hanna and I went to the Worlds Fair in Hannover. It was a summer that goes like most, too fast, but the whole year was like that.

Not to be forgotten, is Holbein Gymnasium, where I went to school. Frau Brenner took great care of all of us exchange students. We had a lot of good meetings up stairs in the alt Bau. I also learned a lot of (and all of my) British English in her 11F class. Participating in Frau Seger's college level English was interesting and entertaining. We had a lot of good class discussions. I could still do some math and physics, no German required. Dr. Lorbeer was also a good mentor. I spent a good portion of time playing in the Holbein Big Band. Herr Kellerman did a great job with us. The concerts, the practice week, the trip to England, and even the weekly practices were awesome.

In a year I experienced what it meant to be German. Most people think Autobahn, Oktoberfest and beer when they think of Germany, but that's like saying the USA is shopping malls, the Statue of Liberty and White House. I had three great host families who helped me make my year one of the most memorable experiences of my life. I became fluent in German and experienced a culture I've fallen in love with. I could go on and on, and to some of you I have. My experience as an exchange student is a book in its own right and the people are the heart of it.

College:
After my year, I started college at RIT, Rochester Institute of Technology in western New York studying mechanical engineering. G7, our dorm, was a happening place. John and I built my first computer, we used to hang out with Brandon, Marci and the rest of the crew. I picked up a part time jobs patrolling the dorms to make sure things were cool and took notes for deaf students taking German. They liked my thoroughness, and I was requested often for the following quarter. I participated in the Leadership program, LEAD my first two years and spent a year as a resident advisor my second year. In the early days, it was a struggle to find the right balance, to see where I wanted my college experience to take me. The time management lessons learned in my fist two years helped make my remaining three years an even greater success. Learning to balance girlfriend, school, work, formula and fun time comes hard when there just aren't enough hours in the day. I have to agree, "The quality of a university is measured more by the kind of student it turns out than the kind it takes in." ~Robert J. Kibbee I'd like to think I'm proof of that, but that I also had something to do with it.

Once in a while Jeremy and I would get together with people and go backpacking in the mountains between south western and northern PA. There's nothing more refreshing than throwing a 40 lb (20kg) pack on and walking through the wilderness for a good 18 mi. (27km). It also became a standard ritual to make the annual drive out to Indianapolis to visit fellow exchange student Scott. Scott went to Purdue and became Pilot and we had a lot of fun flying to Chicago and going to the races.


Far and above all my other activities, I joined the RIT Formula SAE race car team. My 4 active years on the team are almost as indescribable as my exchange. It's hard to explain what it means to be part of a group that designs, builds and races a car, let alone one that successfully competes internationally. I was lucky enough to participate as a group leader and driver in 4 events including two competitions is Australia. While I would have liked to have sampled all the things RIT had to offer, I learned in high school that to be a part of something and make a difference, you have to focus and devote yourself to a couple things and not everything. Some work and party or have hobbies. I devoted four years to formula. I will always miss not having the fifth year, but I had the means to support myself via a good part time job at B&L and decided it was time for me to step up to the plate and do that.

RIT has a good program and professors such as Kozak and Scarborough made learning what it is suppose to be. I might have left RIT with a BS in Mech E, but what I really left with is a great group of friends. I'll always remember the good times with Erin. I am as strong as I am today because of her. Erika taught me to have faith in myself, and see the things others see in me, and the things they don't. I spent a lot of good times with Pam and Aaron, and there aren't too many people who will go to the ER with you. Aaron & Erika made it their mission to remind me that there was life outside of formula, and it would be good for me to enjoy it once in a while. If ever there was a booming voice ringing down the quarter mile that was ready to burst our giggling, it was Liz and it was sure to be an interesting night if she was along.


Co-Ops:
I also had the privilege of working with several great groups of people through my co-ops. While working at Amphenol Aerospace, Bausch & Lomb and Honda R&D, not only did I learn how to be a better engineer, I learned how to be a professional. Each experience gave me some great memories.

Amphenol Aerospace - Sidney, NY I started work the day after returning from racing in Austrailia for the first time. It was a depressing morning, I had been pulled over for doing 92 in a 65 (that's 150 in a 110 for you km/h people) the night before. Oh well, you'll have that. I was working in the test lab, rigging up stuff, testing material samples, analyzing field failures. I learned how to solder. The best memories are drinking coffee while eating my morning bagel and talking to John L and the daily lunchtime pitch games. The table talk was hilarious. I can still hear Phil saying "without knowing." There was Kevin "the kid," Biviano, Barbie girl and the girls (all 30+ mind you) in the room where the plasma chamber was. It was an interesting time, what with me driving out to Rochester every weekend to work on the race car and to try and chase a girl. If there was ever a winter where I proved my driving, that was it.

NCR^3 - RIT Rochester, NY I think if it hadn't been for Bill M. out in the lab, I woulda shot myself. Everyone should have a job they don't like, it teaches you what to watch out for. Nothing wrong with people, just not my cup of tea.

Bausch & Lomb RD&E - Rochester, NY This time around, I decided not to start the day after returning from Australia. I was still jet lagged, but I can remember being in a conference with Travis - TREVOR, Dave B, Tom & Jerry. I was to work on wet vision, whatever that meant. After learning about plumbing from Ray and Ryan, I would soon find out.

In the early days, we didn't know what to expect, no one had ever tried this before. So I spent some time working with Kim, imaged lenses and wrote my first report. Things were always hopping, there was always something new. Process development, software development, hardware improvement, you'd never think it took that much to make something so small. That machine became my baby. I saw concepts of the line and knew the guys from PMD. My understanding of the Irish accent would improve with every weekly conference. I would go to bed at night counting lenses rather than sheep. At a time in my life when people were selling me out left and right, the team, my family at B&L was helping me see and realize my potential.

They kept me on over the summer as I brought Placé and Much up to speed. I don't remember how many cans of coffee I went through that summer, but it would be my finest ever. Wednesday nights were all nighters, but progress had to be made and I had to stay in school. Sleep wasn't a priority. At the end of the summer, I left to check out the automotive world at Honda.

After Honda, I came back for more, and more lunches. Placé and I would tag team the vision system with Much Baaaahhhhh-ing all the way. We were working on our senior design project. Double your pleasure, double your fun, we were going full bore. It would be another TLA (three letter acronym) with LBI. After graduating, and with the arrival of the line, the all out onslaught began. We were processing lenses faster than we could process data, it was great. It was also great to see the concepts, how they had changed, changed again and finally been built into one awesome lens making machine. We had to bring John G JR on just so we could focus on vision. I've seen robots do things I never knew they could and met the CEO. I left knowing the meaning of requirements and acceptance criteria.

The end was bitter sweet. I had a family there, I was the grandfather of wet vision. I was going to have to stop riding the lunch train. It was great to play my first game of golf at the beginning of September with Joe, Tom, Travis and the rest of us hooligans who were PAQ. The going away party the next Friday ranks up there next to golf as some of the best times I've had. I was never so sad for a night to end as I was riding back in Bill's boat after partying for 12 hours straight. It was so good, I had to stop in one last time afterwards, just to see everyone one more time, and get one more free lunch(thanks guys). Thank you Tom, Bill, Much and Placé, you guys were the best.

Honda R&D - Marysville, Ohio Up until the point I moved down to the small city outside of Columbus, all I knew is that it took forever to drive through Ohio. Honda was unlike anything I've ever seen. We had white uniforms with our names on them, but they washed them for you. I would have been willing to wear a uniform all through college for free laundry. There were 5 of us co-oping in the group. We all lived in the near by housing complex, we all suffered from the same illness, we were all a bunch of crazy mo-fo's. In no time at all, we had a full program. Mondays and Thursdays were Soccer with our group in the Honda league. Tuesdays we went to Buffalo Wild Wings with all the other co-ops social enough to go out for wings and beer. Wednesdays we went climbing and the weekends were always filled with something crazy. We played drunken Gran Turismo 3 with spec racer mini (Cooper, the original), autocrossed, or went to one of the many parties being hosted by a fellow associate. With all the activity, we were able to start our own weekly newsletter. We were the co-op crew and we had almost as much fun at work as we did outside of it. If I could remember all the co-op jokes. But I remember k-factor, kgf, and DAQ. I'll never forget going out to Stone Hause with Joan and Krista, Chris's 21st, the 555 TT, pimping out the Breeze with Paul, Riding around in the TL with Chris, setting up equipment with Howard, Jeremiah & John (not to mention getting busted on), and playing soccer with Fink, Hutter, Wyatt Earp, Andy "A-Train" & Ryan. I learned that you can drive a shuttle car like a shuttle, but don't need to go through NASA training to do it. Paul's halloween party was a religious experience thanks to Pete. Luckily I wasn't the one who should have been going to confession the next day. I'll never be able to look at another nurse the same again. I'll never forget hearing Nick screaming "That's right!" from his perch in the indoor hall. My P&%§$§ will always hurt, but I will never forget to drive 90 and swerve a lot. My going away party at the Stone House was amazing. I don't remember how many beers everyone bought me, but I do remember the meatball sub. There was Honda Prom last Dec. and I had the pleasure to catch up with some of the gang last March. If I'm ever in town in the fall, I'll be sure to bring my cleats and shin guards. It was the busiest three months of my life and I was happy to hear that I was more than what Brain and Richard thought I'd be.

Germany - The Return:
Sometimes you just can't get enough. People say they'd always see a glow in my eye every time I'd talk about my exchange. I couldn't stay away. I had to see what it was like to be here again, and on my own. I had to see if I could run across the same dream twice. I heard the best of the best were here, so I thought I’d come check it out.

Since the end of October 2005, I've been in Würzburg. I'm working for Siemens VDO, the automotive subsidiary of Siemens. I started off as an applications engineer. By May 2006, I was fairly well worked in and could pick up stuff and run with it. I kept improving over the summer and at the start of September 2006, I was handed my first project. I was unofficially given the PM. I joined the few, the brave, the project managers. By the end of the month, things had changed and I was to take over 2 additional projects. Things went from two suppliers and one customer then multiplied in both directions. Everything was tight, but it worked out in the end.

2006 was an amazing year. I spent a lot of time hanging with Jochen, Manual and the rock star crew. I’ve enjoyed their concerts and enjoyed the nightlife with them. There have been a lot of activities outside of work with my colleagues, where it has been nice to enjoy not talking about work. Everything from breakfast with the girls to full out get-togethers. I have enormous respect and admiration for everyone in our group. With the amount of time I spend with them, they are in many ways, my family away from my family. The occasional road trip with Brian and Jessica has always been an adventure. There has been the internat (high school) dorm crew and that has rounded things out. The times playing soccer, grilling down on the Main and late night chats with Jonnas, Marcel, Fanzi, Lili and Verena.

Inside of a year, I had made it to the point where people inside our project management and apps team wanted me to get hired in. I was loving the work, loved the team and couldn’t complain too much about life. I was completely willing, but it would be a tough up hill battle. It has been an honor to work with Oli, Gitte, Erkan, Roland, Jessica, Carina, Karen, Daniel, Rainer and Peter. That’s our immediate team. Their approval has meant a lot to me. As ’06 was drawing to a close, I was also overcome with how many other people were so concerned and hoped I’d stay.

You might have well taken the water tower from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and painted “Save Frank,” instead. It felt like that. Motor R&D, logistics, quality, purchasing, the sample shop, people out on the floor, customers and maybe even a supplier, or two, they were all crossing their fingers for me.

Before the year closed out, we hit our targets. I had had a bit of help. I have a damn good team. The last 3 months had been quite a killer, but we came out alright and I went home for the first time in 1 year, 2 months, and 21 days. Some would argue I had more than earned it. I had done more than anyone ever expected from me, especially at the start. I had gone above and beyond the duty of a co-op, but maybe that’s because I never saw myself as one. I only earned the co-op wage.

Coming back was a double edged sword. It had been wonderful being home, but, like always, I had something here to do. I wasn't done yet. At the start of ‘007, things looked like not even Bond himself would be able to save my ass. But who needs Bond, maybe all I needed was Dirty Harry, but I suppose a lot of people would say the same thing, “You earned it.” Well, I’m not going to discuss it. If you know me, you know I try to keep it on the down low, modest and let things speak for themselves.

There might be a method to my madness. It looks like I’m going to extend my time here for another 2.5 years, as long as they give me the German equivalent to a green card. So there it is, I kept it low key and did just what I set out to do. I got everything except the girl, but you'll have that at times.

In Closing:
It's closing time. Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. I haven't forgotten anyone or anything, there are some memories that are just for me.

To the ladies out there who inspired me to write, draw, speed, drink, and above all else, be the best that is me, I'd love to go into the details, but that wouldn't be right now would it. You know who you are.

I look forward to any feedback you might have for me. Feel free to sign the guestbook and leave me some lovin. There is now an email address as well.

I still haven’t really spell checked anything. Why would I do that.... hehehe
"It's a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word." Andrew Jackson
My English continues to deteriorate, but I hope it’s still entertaining. It's still good enough to educate those around me on terms like SNAFU.

This post has been rated PG-13, but don't be surprised if you exceed R should you feel the need to snoop around. Children be warned, you might learn something.

Your Editor,
Frank Capristo III

capristolive@googlemail.com

What is Capristo

About the title - Unless you can imagine a robot with a russian accent, the title isn't funny, but the boys at B&L know.

A Capristo is not a timid man, he is a passion expert. If it has wheels he will drive it, if it's on fire he will put it out. If he's lucky, people will remember him for working is heart out and pouring it into everything he does. Day, night, rain, shine, sleep or not, a Capristo is a guy who will go anywhere and do anything for the people in his life.








His endurance and dedication is second to none. If you need to go to Connecticut and back in a night to see about a girl, he is your man. The watermelon runs are as legendary as the land speed record between Utica and scout camp on Crumhorn Mnt . In the midst of the fire, he will take the heat and get the job done. He will do the right thing, even if it is the unpopular thing. He is a man of honor.










Make no mistake about it, but he is also a laid back man. When the heat is off, the game face turns into the face of games. The humor is sure to be filled with double meanings, sexual innuendos and movie lines. He enjoys going out for a drink or two, or anything else in the name of fun. Even just hanging out is above a dull roar. He will push the limit of comedy just to get that look. He is a man's man and a ladies man.









A Capristo is a dreamer, creator and craftsman. He is good with his hands and has the right touch. Not only can he see it, but he has the skills to do it big, do it right and do it with style. There is no half Capristo, he is all or nothing. On warm clear nights, you will find him out in a field, or along a shore looking up on the stars.











A Capristo is a lover and a romantic. For those who have dared to get this close to one, they will remember it for the rest of their lives. It is the Capristo family secret which has been passed on from father to son for generations (well, at least one) and been verified by a call to the old man on at least one occasion(boy was he surprised).














Above all else, a Capristo is a family man. He will work as many jobs as it takes to provide. He will drive all day to spend 30 minutes in the hospital. He never forgets to visit those whose time has passed and will clear the snow from the stone with his bare hands in the middle of the night.








And that is a Capristo.

Who is this Frank Guy - Random Thoughts

My Random Thoughts

26.09.2007 Last of the Nice Guys

Forwarded:

To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful."
To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town
(or across the state) to see her.

To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick.
To every guy who has given her flowers just because.

To every guy that said he would die for her.
To every guy that really would.
To every guy that did what she wanted to do.

To every guy that cried in front of her.
To every guy that she cried in front of.
To every guy that holds hands with her.
To every guy that kisses her with meaning.

To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.
To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.
To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.
To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.

To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours
just to see her for ten minutes
To every guy that would give his seat up.
To every guy that just wants to cuddle.
To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful
no matter what.

To every guy who told his secrets to her.
To every guy that tried to show how much he cared
through every word and every breath.
To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.

To every guy that believed in her dreams.
To every guy that would have done anything
so she could achieve them.
To every guy that never laughed at her
when she told him her dreams.

To every guy that walked her to her car.
To every guy that gave his heart.
To every guy who prays that she is happy
even if you are not with her.

...This one bulletin is for you...

Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore...
And because of this, there are not many left out there...
If you are a nice guy repost this with "We're a Dying Breed "
If you are a girl that thinks every guy should treat a girl this way
repost this with: "To Every Guy...

FC: I couldn't agree with the closing more. Often times growing up, I adapted the line from Days of Thunder, "they need a brand name, an athlete or a player." Meanwhile all I could do was beg for a chance, just one chance to show someone I thought was special what I could, what I would do for them. I became a man of poetry, and wrote for no one that was mine, but she who would someday be the one. Of course I was inspired and likewise rejected by some, all but a few over the years, not that there were many.

By the time I got through the first semester of college, I was about ready to write a book entitled "Just a Friend," and have often enough felt that way since. I coined the phrase "Nice guys finish last, but we do finish, we always finish. - And plus, the women like it better that way."

And at times I find myself feeling those same old feelings. The hopeless romantic has not died, but experience has taught him all too well about the rules of love. Everyone should love and loose, and know what it's truly like. The nice guys are there, and seek to have a relationship. It's often they who are the shoulders that get cried on when the lady gets her heart broken by one of the others. The story repeats itself over and over. I've seen it many a time. And yet it changes nothing. For the ones where it is just a game, who could so easily have the true rewards if they weren't so blind to it, well it just doesn't seem fair. The nice guys are there, and could do it all, but we're never the right "type."

Life is not fair. More and more, practicality replaces principle. You adapt to where the rewards and gains are. As said in Hitch, you can make it so you never have to feel that way again. But for the true nice guys out there, straight to the core, and burnt to the core but not broken, we are the last of a dying breed.

22.08.2007 Falling in Love - Hard on the Knees

And there it is, a certain smile, a certain sparkle. I haven’t known it in so long I’m not sure if I’m dreaming or not. My face starts to ache from smiling back and I know I’m awake. We haven’t know each other for very long, but here we are, and my heart already sways. Is it the look in your eyes doing that to me, or the way your bangs come off to the side?

Once again I feel myself being reduced down to feeling like I know nothing about the world. I don’t know if you feel the same way or not, but can’t help hoping that you’ll fall for me so I can hold you in my arms and kiss you deep.

Is that too much too fast? I don’t know the rules any more. You redefined them. All I know is how nice it would be to lay out on a blanket in the park with you, sit and have a cappuccino at a café with you, dance the night away and fall asleep in your arms. And that’s all I know.

Frank the Mentor?

“"You never know when you might have the chance to enjoy it again...Too many hobbies, too little time. That’s life....And life, we each live our own. The wild live it by their own divine will, the weak follow the world around them, and the strong mix both to provide unique experiences in their lives, but with adequate self balance, criticism and check. Of course that is my view, and as such I try to live by my own words.” -Frank Capristo... my good friend and mentor..." Josh G.

No, I’m not sure I would have believed it either without reading it for my own eyes. It’s always an honor when something like that turns up. I suppose my first thought was, did I write that? And I checked that current events and thought, “Oh yeah, I guess I did.” And then I thought, someone actually reads this crap. I like to philosophize about life, thoughts, ideas, feelings. I do it whenever I have enough time to let my mind wander for a little while, and I’m not daydreaming.

It doesn’t happen often enough. When you’re a kid, if you didn’t get smacked for dropping the f-bomb, you probably received a hefty time out. Fuck, if I had that luxury today, I’d be one well rested daydreaming fool. Writing always helps me to relieve the internal stress. It’s similar to talking to a good friend, in that you get to vent, which is sometimes all you need. Talking to a good friend is always good, human interaction. Still, writing is fun all by itself. The fact that someone else reads it and takes it to heart is something I always find amazing. The power of a voice.

So me, a mentor? Get outta town. I mean I remember a few of us laying out under the stars by the flag pole at camp, chatting about life, liberty and the pursuit of women. It just so happened, that my last summer up there started right after I had gotten cheated on and dumped. It was a very philosophical time for me. Of course I told everyone that I wasn’t too affected. I was trying to convince myself of that, that it didn’t matter, and that I would find someone better. The whole time, I was only missing what I had had, what someone else now had, and it was eating me up the whole summer.

Live and learn. I asked a lot of questions that summer, and explained quite a few thoughts, while trying to mask the feelings. Still, I’m too much of a dynamic person, and the people who know me can always see through it, and know to take that itself as a sign of how I’m doing. All I ever explain is my rational, something anyone else could come up with. I try to look at all points and place myself in all the shoes. Hardly anything in the world is single sided, and most of it is 3D. One has to try and think that way as well.

I guess neither myself, nor most others would put it past me. I spent six summers teaching outdoor skills to rambunctious preadolescent kids who were off their Ritalin for the summer. If you can do that, you can do a lot of things. But teaching is not mentoring, there is a difference. Mentoring requires letting someone lead themselves, and just presenting information on the table. They get to choose what to take. Mentoring often lead to helping people to look inside themselves. They end up looking deep within, to find and listen to their true voice, the voice where the heart, the mind and the soul are one, the same and in harmony. It’s a hard place to come to, and I don’t think most people ever really know for sure, even after they’ve found it.

Still, we each have to trust in it, knowing that if things don’t go the way they should have, when plans and expectations fall through, that one can always return to the true people and places that one has, the things that are timeless. They are the family and friends, where the time in between seeing them never changes the relationship. It could have been yesterday that you saw them last, rather than 4 months ago. They are the places that may change over time, but never fail to loose their feeling. One need not to have the largest family, 1000 friends, or have been to every corner of the globe. Quantity does not surpass quality and the only race we run is against ourselves. Everything else is trivial. For everything else, there’s Mastercard, casinos, alcohol and prostitutes.

In life, it is seldom that your first ever kiss or date becomes your mate. This is usually the exception to the rule, and life’s path is often the same. More often is the case, that we live a series of relationships. Sometimes we end them, sometimes someone else ends them. Sometimes you are in one and tempted to be in another. Life is a duel between choices.

There is always a rock and a hard place. And for some, when tempted, they will make the jump. It’s usually the gutsy move and not so often the case. It goes against human nature to be reckless, and more often than not, is done only as an excuse to be reckless. The only certainty is that nothing is for certain. Others will stay with what they have, with what they know. And some will stay with the one they have, but always dream back on the chance they gave up, and how it could have been, maybe even how it should have been.

That’s life, and most times, it isn’t till afterwards, after the dust has settled, after the heart rate and blood pressure have gone down, that we see with clarity. Call it Monday morning quarterbacking, sure. In the heat of the moment, you only have split seconds to think and react. But when it comes to the course of our lives, you can go to a friend, or to one of those places for a few hours. You can relax, put it all out of your mind for a little while and then come back to it. Things often look different after that. A little breather after going crazy is good for the soul.

Coming to terms with what you will have and what you will have to give up is always a challenge. But as I always try to remember, when worst comes to worst, there will always be those people and those places, and they seldom go away, they are always there. And even when the distance separates them from you, you can close your eyes and go there, deep within your heart, where you always carry them.

Frank’s Personality

No one ever asks me if I know who Tyler Durden is. Sometimes though, I kinda wonder who I am. The world is a funny place. You look at yourself every morning in the mirror, you have your thoughts, your reasons, your character. Still, does it come off the way you want it to? I was screwing around last Friday night and ran across a little personality test. I’d like to say it’s pretty accurate. I should hope so. I answered the questions honest, but maybe a bit modest. I present them now to you.

Frank’s Agreeableness

- Does he take care of others, or take care of his own selfish ass?

This section describes Frank’s interactions with other people. The ways we communicate our feelings, beliefs and ideas to others are influenced by our cultural backgrounds, the way we were raised, and sometimes, which side of the bed we got up on that morning. Some of us are very mindful of others, making decisions we hope will be in the best interests of others even if it means sometimes neglecting our own interests. Others believe each person should be responsible for themselves, taking deep pride in their own character and independence with a firm belief that others are best served by doing the same. The following describes how Frank engages with others; illustrating the dimension of his personality that determines his independence and his desire to reach out and touch others in meaningful ways.

Frank is best described as usually taking care of himself.

Words that describe Frank:

Perceptive Realistic Demanding

Down-to-Earth Hardnosed Judgmental

Pragmatic Skeptical

How he interacts with others:

He is clearly a compassionate person (He’s a Capristo. Read: Passion Expert). He believes that one should do unto others as they would have others do unto them, and he knows that friends help their friends. But with him, compassion is just one side of the coin; the other being a side that he also expects others to hold up their end of the bargain. So he helps others, but it is with the expectation that others don't take advantage of him or try to put one over. In short, he expects others to treat him as he treats them.

And for those people who do ask for help when they should have taken responsibility for themselves? This is the time when his more hard-edged side comes out. He is skeptical of people when they expect others to bail them out of trouble. If they got themselves into the bind, they should work their way out of the trouble. If it's an emergency, or if it's a friend who has been there for him when he has had hard times, he is there in a jiffy. But he is a discerning person and to him there is a big difference between an emergency and a self-inflicted wound. He just looks at the facts: how the situation developed, how serious is the situation, and how they can or cannot get through things on their own. The history he has with the person and with similar situations will inform him whether he should get involved or not.

He also has some limits when it comes to being with people. Sure some people need to be with others all the time, and seem to get recharged by helping out most anyone else. But that's not exactly him. He knows that he does best if he spends a fair amount of time on his own. Not that he’s a loner, just that time spent by himself is not wasted at all. He’s come to understand that if you don't take good care of yourself, eventually you won’t be any good to anyone, including himself and others.

So his compassion is tempered by realism. His sympathy for people in trouble is balanced by a critical evaluation of how dumb they are in the first place. Learning by doing. He’s been there himself and might be again. And he’s learned to take good care of himself, so he had something to give to hid friends or others truly in need.

Typical Negative Reactions People Have to the Frankster:

Some people may see his practical style as lacking compassion. When his compassion is tempered, as it is at times by his discerning questions and careful consideration, it may seem to some like he has too much head and too little heart. And when he uses time and energy to take care of himself, there will inevitably be some who see this as selfish and uncaring. But his approach is neither heady nor selfish. It is Frank. And since it doesn’t appear to be causing him consistent problems in important relationships, there is really no reason to change. His distinctive manner of having clear expectations for the relationships in which he’s in, will exert his energy and show his true core.

The Good Stuff:

The truth is that most people respect someone who knows themselves and what they want. So even if some people don't get exactly what they want from him, they will often leave with a deeper sense of respect for this guy. His frank and honest approach may help someone to help themselves when they didn't think this was possible. They wind up better off: they're out of trouble, they did it on their own, and they have him to thank. And Frank was true to himself. A good chap indeed.

Frank’s Openness

Curious or Contented?

(Definitely straight by the way.)

What you’re going to learn is how firmly committed he is to the ideas and beliefs that govern his thinking and guide his behavior. Some people trust their current ideas and beliefs the way a climber trusts the mountain; whichever way they move, whether the climb is on a familiar trail or over new ground, there is something solid beneath them, something they count on.

For others, new ideas, new solutions to old problems, new beliefs that replace tired convictions are like welcome wind in their sails. They can hardly wait to tack in a new direction and ride a new idea through uncharted waters. If it's new, it's interesting, and they're ready to explore.

The following paragraphs describe Frank’s responses to new ways of thinking and believing. How do he handle new information? Is he more like the climber on a familiar mountain or a sailor with a tiller in hand and a fresh breeze to propel him (maybe it’s the rum doing all the propelling, they did say sailor)? How he integrates and processes new information about the world and about others is a core aspect of everyone’s personality.

Frank is sometimes curious, sometimes content.

(Curious {not the right word, but bear with it} to have sex, content to wait for women who are mentally sane and the right ones.)

More words to describe Frank:

Accepting Flexible Educated

Self-aware Middle-of-the-road Proper

Distinctive Indecisive Adaptable

How does this dude approach new information and experiences?

Like someone who can sleep comfortably on either side of the bed (who says he sleeps?), he is equally at home with ideas and beliefs that he has held for a long time, and with new ways of thinking and believing that grow out of his intellectual curiosity.

His sense of who he is, and what his place is in the world around him, rests on values and principles that make up the solid ground he walks on. He’s tested them. They work for him. And most of the time, he is content to trust them, that is, until some provocative new idea slips in from a conversation, book or some flight of his active imagination. "Hmmmm. What's this. Never thought of it before." And off he goes, exploring.

Since he loves to learn, he’s always been teachable (Ladies take note). He absorbs new information, which means he is well-educated in things that matter to him. Sometimes his intellectual exploring will lead back to where he started; the "next new thing" proves too shallow or impractical to him. But once in a while, a new idea or belief will shift him from the ground he’s stood upon. It is so compelling and persuasive that he has to step away from the tried-and-true, and embrace this notion that is brand new to him.

Because he holds both solid beliefs and is open to new ideas, he is accepting of other people as well as other ways of thinking and believing. He is flexible enough to listen to something new and different, or something outside of his comfort zone. If it works for him, he'll take it in, and if not, he let’s it go. In this sense, he knows who he is: he is neither closed-minded nor wildly open-minded, but walk somewhere near the middle of the intellectual road and reason.

The things people are going to bitch about due to his way of thinking:

Not everyone will be thrilled by his flexible, middle-of-the-road (a matter of opinion in my opinion.) ways of thinking and believing. A few people are so taken with flights of imagination into whatever is new, that they might find his commitment to long-standing values and beliefs too confining, if not too boring. Oh well; so be it. They'll just have to be in free-flight without him.

Others are content with the ideas that have served them and their culture well. They're not excited by the prospect of moving on. And some people are afraid of new ways of thinking because they are somewhat fragile. They have trouble maintaining their current worlds and don't want someone like Frankie-boy, for instance, pushing out the edges of their intellectual cosmos. Don't be surprised if his solid values sometimes make people distrust him as an explorer, or if his flexible and open mind sometimes gets him criticized by people who walk away from the very same explorations that he finds refreshing.

What the bros will might say about their bro:

Many will find him trustworthy and therefore an attractive companion on the intellectual journey. They will appreciate the combination of his open-mindedness and commitment to the tried-and-true. In an intellectual climate sometimes dominated by the extremes of either wild innovation or dug-in traditionalism, his moderate views and proper acceptance of a wide range of possibilities will be a distinctive and refreshing quality. Because he joins his curiosity with strong foundational ideas, beliefs and practical solutions to problems, people will trust his occasional explorations into new territories to be reliable, and not "something new for newness sake".

He is accepting of others, flexible in his own intellectual commitments, well-informed in areas that matter to him. He is also comfortably aware of who he is and where he stands. This combination will make him a desirable companion on the intellectual journey for many, many people.

Emotional Stability

Steady or unsteady?

(Sounds like a fluids test to me.)

The crash course in crap you need to know about emotional stability:

We're all born with the capacity to feel deeply, so it's as natural as breathing to experience a range of emotions. Fear and joy, sadness and anger, shame and disgust all lie somewhere within each of us. Ah, but to what extent do we control these emotions, and to what extent do they control us? How we each answer this question of how our emotions play out in our lives has a great deal to do with our levels of personal satisfaction and with the character of our relationships with others.

Does Frank manage his emotions well, keeping them in check with his thinking and willpower, or is he someone who lets emotions have their way, giving in to the wild dance of feelings? The following paragraphs describe his emotional range in terms of being a person who is either emotionally steady or someone who is responsive to whatever feelings swell up within.

What surprised the hell out of Frank when he read it: Very Responsive!

Do any of these words ring a bell when trying to describe him?

Emotional Insightful Perceptive

Sensitive Self-conscious

A general description of Frank’s radioactivity (Is there a half-life to this):

Each one of us encounters some hard times; we get caught off guard, or feel a sudden swell of emotion, whether from fear, joy, anger or sadness. Life is just a bitch sometimes. Sorry about your luck.

Frank knows that because he is an emotional person (A sensitive side for you ladies). Some people go to great lengths to keep their emotions under wraps, to keep a stiff upper lip, to not let others know what emotions they are feeling. But that’s not Frank. He embraces all of life's emotions, both the joys and the turmoil that life brings our way. (What else am I going to do, sell it on EBay?)

When he’s having fun with a group of friends, he doesn't even try to contain his pleasure. He laughs hard and feels every moment of the conversation. He does this because of the joy that comes from the experience. He makes very intense friendships; ones where all of the depth of emotions one can feel are experienced. Emotions are an essential part of his everyday life. He may cry at intense movies or when watching a sad story on the evening news (Naw, usually I’m laughing in disbelief at how dumb the world is). He gets angry, at others or (mostly) himself, and he doesn’t stifle it. Emotions drive his personality and relationships - he simply is what he feels (I guess that’s a passion for life, but who knows).

He experiences both highs and lows more profoundly than most (without the added overhead of doing drugs I might add). And he usually relishes the intensity of his emotions. He surely enjoys the good times. There are those times, though, when his feelings get the best of him, and he wonders how he’ll manage the moment (Bah, don’t let the man get you down. There ain’t nothing you can’t do in a race car). Because he’s so in tune with all his emotions, he will experience something very pleasant and will be able to engage with that positive feeling to again enjoy the wonderful intensity that life has to offer.

More bitching from the peanut gallery:

If we were to ask Frank what negative reactions may result from his approach to his emotions, it would likely be that some people find it hard to deal with his strong feelings. They might think of him as emotionally "over the top," and wish he would be more like those who are always emotionally composed and less prone to fully engage their emotions.

What the other critics might say:

Despite any negative reactions others may have towards him, many people will be grateful for his strong emotions, and willingness to experience these emotions. They will appreciate the candor with which he expresses even his deepest feelings, feelings they themselves might want to express, but may find difficult to share. Frank’s openness will be an encouragement to them as well. Still others may find his intensity compelling (Hint: wear sunglasses if it’s too bright for ya). Some feel emotionally flat, and he could be a burst of passion in their dull worlds (Or when the man has you down), and an encouragement to them to "get with" their own feelings (Dating yourself? I’ve been getting with myself for months. All I got was the encouragement to find a woman). Any or all of these people will be grateful for a friend who is so emotionally present.

Conscientiousness

Focused or Flexible?

I know it reads like stereo instructions, but:

It's a work day, breakfast is over. He’s dressed and ready to go. So how will our Frank approach the tasks at hand? Some people work best with a clear schedule, a set of priorities and a due date for every step in the process. Others are, shall we say, less regimented. They approach a task with as much imagination as organization, and with a willingness to bend and modify in order to exercise some urge of creativity.

What about Frank? Does he walk in a straight line toward a clear goal, or is he more likely to dance his way down whatever path will get him wherever it is he’s headed? The following paragraphs describe ways in which Frankie-poo approaches the tasks life brings. You’ll also find out to what extent he is focused and/or flexible in how he chooses to proceed.

Frank’s Approach to Obligation is: Focused & Flexible

Another table with bullets and words:

Casual Informal Compliant

Reliable Organized Solid

Dependable Uncommitted Genuine

How does he do this:

When he takes on a task at work or at home, he’s reliable. He get’s the job done. In an organized way, he defines the goal, lays out a plan, figures how long the task will take, and gets to work "solid and dependable as always."

But and this is important, he’s not a slave to the plan. He’s committed to it, but not chained to it. The connection is more casual and informal. He knows that sometimes "the best laid plans" fall off the tracks or out of the sky. When this happens, he cleans up the train wreck and starts over, undeterred.

Though not happening often, when plans change, he’s okay with it. In fact, sometimes he’ll change the plan. For example, if it's too nice of a Saturday to finish organizing the garage, he might say “Let's go for a bike ride instead.” True, the next rainy Saturday will likely find him back in the garage, but for now the work can wait. (It’s all about getting the most out of life, the optimum burn for intensity and longevity.)

What an interesting (their choice of word, not mine) combination of qualities. He’s organized, but casual; solid, but compliant; and dependable, but informal. At home and at work, people know they can rely on him. He takes great satisfaction in knowing that people think of him as disciplined and responsible, but he also knows that you have to have something of a free spirit inside. When this spirit moves him, off he goes, following the impulse of the moment. He’s right proud of his work ethic, but he also enjoys his willingness to lay the tools down, crank up the music, and play like a child (Work hard, play hard).

More comments from Siskell and Ebert, though I prefer Statler and Waldorf:

Some people live like Marines: duty-bound, disciplined and driven. To these people your man Frank might seem uncommitted. Where they would never leave work for play, or change plans in the middle of their life's forced march, Frank lets the circumstance sway him and move in a different direction. They don't understand.

Others live like kites on a string, attached by thin threads to the solid ground of responsibility and are blown about by every gust of impulse or imagination. To these people Frank might seem too cowardly, like he'll flirt with the impulses, but never give in fully, play on a Saturday but never blow of the entire work-week to "follow his bliss".

While these Marines and kite-flyers might look down on him for his combination of focus and flexibility, others might be envious. They can't free themselves from a sense that they're not doing enough, or from the equally frustrating feeling that they're not free enough.

And here Frank is, with his accomplishments and pleasures, getting the job done but also getting his hair blown back as he runs with the wind, or straight into it. As far as these people are concerned, he’s lucky to have the best of both of the worlds in which they feel they fail.

Comments from those likely on prozac, zanifdol or any of those other drugs with little cartoon characters running across the screen:

What a great life Frank has, and a great attitude to boot. When he’s not being a sarcastic SOB, he knows when to buckle down and push ahead to get the job done (as does every Capristo), and he does it well. He knows when to lay the tools of the trade aside, grab his kite and head for the meadow where he can run with the wind as well (Or stay at home and pleasure the misses). Many people will see and admire Freddie for this lovely combination of a person who can focus, but who is flexible enough to know when to let the spirit move him in some new and livelier direction.

It's a life most aspire to, and people are delighted in seeing it played out in his life. Some may ask his advice and turn him into a mentor of the full and balanced experience. They will want to know how he does it, what the costs are, and if he gets frightened (I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me?) that he’s not working hard enough or playing often enough. They may make him think about his own life more than he has, so he can share it with those who want to emulate this balance between flexibility and focus. They may be correct, that lucky son of a gun!

Extraversion

Outgoing or Reserved?

It’s your last chance, but in case you’re too dumb to figure it out:

Some days Franktoberfest wants to hang out by himself, not answer the phone, and make the world go away. The next day he’ll e-mail everyone, go to lunch with a friend, and try to find some gathering to take part in that evening (I didn’t know I was a fucking rollercoaster). It may be the phases of the moon, or something he ate; some days are just like that. In actuality, his desire to be with others or to be alone reflects something deep in his personality. Some of us are more comfortable by ourselves or with one or two friends, while others crave the crowd and can't stand it when the house is empty or the phone doesn't ring. The following paragraphs describe Frank’s fundamental desires about being with other people; whether he is generally an outgoing person or more reserved, if he seeks adventures with others, and if he tends toward assertiveness or kindness.

When it comes to being an arogant prick or being a floppy cock, Frank is:

Sometimes Outgoing, Sometimes Reserved

The last little box of words describing Frankie Boy:

Moderate Amiable Laid-back

Temperate Relaxed Poised

Civil Uncommitted Pleasant

A general description of how Frank plays with himself and with others (Princess Bride “gentley”):
Lucky Spank! He enjoys his own company as much as he enjoys the company of others. He’s a great conversationalist and thrives in the wonderful kinds of connections he knows how to have with his family and friends. He also equally enjoys his own company, whether sitting in a favorite chair with his book and soft music playing or wandering in the woods by himself. He likes going home to his family or roommate (when he has one); but if no one is home, he finds quiet, solitary time to be just as pleasurable. What a great combination to enjoy being outgoing and to be just as comfortable being reserved. Lucky Focker!!

Because he is so amiable and relaxed, he is comfortable with almost any group of family or friends. Whether they are pumped up and lively or calm and subdued, he remains at ease. If someone needs to take over the conversation, he is comfortable taking the lead. Frank can also lay back and let someone else be in charge. No big f-ing deal. If the conversation gets rowdy, his moderate demeanor will often draw it down to a more temperate level. If someone in the group loses their cool, he will most likely maintain his poise, and if they get nasty he knows how to keep a civil tongue, even though he may want to back hand the SOB.

He may find himself out of balance on occasion. If he’s alone too much, he may need to get in touch with someone. If he spends too much time with his family and friends, he will most likely need to sneak off for a day by himself. He’ll putter and read and clear his head of the noise of too much conversation. When he’s at his best, he lives in a rhythm of time with others, time alone, time with others, and time alone. It's a satisfying, comfortable balance. Lucky him!

The Last Bit O’Negativity
Our Frank may occasionally run into problems with other people. Since not everyone is as balanced as he is, close friends and family may get frustrated with him, or he with them. They may be more sociable and outgoing, and find him too laid-back and relaxed. They want conversations to be lively and passionate while he keeps things amiable, civil and dialed down. Or, others may be more quiet and reserved than him, and when he’s in one of his more animated moments, they may wish he would back off, sit down and shut the hell up. He may be ready to put more energy into a conversation than they are comfortable with.

His balance may be a problem. Other people may be consistently more sociable or more reserved than him, and find him to hard to read. Some may even say he rides the fence. Others may find themselves envious of his ability to be outgoing at times, and at other times comfortably reserved. As long as he has his head pulled out of his ass, and pays attention to pick up on these cues, he’ll be in a better position to interact with such folks.

End It On a High Note; Get Stoned, Get in a Plane, Get High In a Plane:

Most people, of all IQ’s, will truly appreciate his flexibility in social situations. They will like him for his amiable warmth and willingness to put in his two cents. At the same time, they will respect and admire him for his ability to sit back and let others take the lead or the spotlight. No insecurities about needing to be the center of attention with this guy. They will appreciate the ways in which he tempers what could become intemperate moments; by remaining poised and relaxed when others are flipping out and getting out of line. When the temperatures are a rising, he cools things off to keep everyone merry and chill (We’re only talking about social settings here ladies, this Capristo is all Capristo).

He is as good at listening and following as he is at talking and leading. A true leader helps others to lead themselves. People will often appreciate his ability to adapt to the situations at hand. Because he is sometimes outgoing and sometimes reserved, he’ll make most people comfortable in his presence, and they will truly enjoy his company.

In Closing

There you have it, to the best of my ability, I hereby sign away my life, liberty and first born child should I be found guilty of perjury. I answered a whole bunch of questions as best as I could. I hope you agree, agree with the good, and can help me improve those other points. We never stop growing as people, but we each have our cores. This has been an attempt to let you all look in. I hope you enjoyed.

Frank’s Type of Girl

Everyone always ends up saying the same thing; “Frank, we need to find you a girl.” Sometimes they say a girl who will unmercifully ride me from dusk till dawn, although use me like a pogo stick was more often used.

Indeed, I often find myself quoting Pirates of the Caribbean with “You’ve got to find yourself a girl mate.” Unlike the movie, I haven’t already found myself one. Kiera doesn’t live in the neighborhood.

Here we are though, Frankie’s been just about another year in Germany, seen lots of eye candy, but never been able to sample let alone claim one of Germany’s honeys for his own. As always, I am inclined to wonder why?

For starters, it goes back to the way it’s always been, Frankie doesn’t know to mack. When I’m in my game, I know how to play, but my game has never been the walk up to some random attractive girl and as her her name. My game has always been the random chance game, where someone introduces me and we start to chat. On the off chance that a buddy is a’mackin, and I happen to be playing wingman, it’s easy cause I’m just along for the ride. In very rare circumstances, some girl find me irresistible and has to be over obvious with me. And that’s the way it is.

I suppose the hard part for me, is that the level of attractiveness doesn’t guarantee the level of attractiveness, if you know what I mean. Beauty doesn’t mean I’m going to remain interested, and I want to have something more than that to go on.

So what am I really after? What kind of girl is Frank’s type? I think part of my problem is that I don’t exactly know myself. I know what I know from experience, I know what I want to do with my life, and what that means as far as a woman, is somewhat hard to explain. I find myself turning to The Girl Next Door, although I’m not looking for a blond in particular.

I go to the diner scene. They’re there and she’s telling the kid they need to find him a girl who is attractive, can make him laugh and who will push him to do things he never thought possible. Indeed. And to evaluate that, I don’t like the over made up beauties. Most actresses and models are attractive, but only in the over done sense. Maybe that’s my opinion, cause that’s the only way I ever see them other than how they’re made up for some film. But I must confess, I’ve found certain ones attractive in a film, but the real life shots of them just plain… suck. I don’t like the plastic look. I don’t like the over generous chest, or anorexic looks either. I don’t like the frills or extreme looks. I like the tasteful girl next door look.

I don’t usually like the short hair look. I’m usually more of a fan of shoulder length or longer. Hair and eye color don’t really matter, it’s usually more of just a way everything looks together. I know I’m a big fan of legs and not chests. Looks are usually a case by case basis with me, but I know I’m not a fan of the piercing or tattoo ladies. Ear rings are nice, leave the nose and everything else alone.

Personality, of course it’s important. There are some guys who refer to girls that have personality, meaning they have large chests, but I’m after the real thing. What does that mean? I can’t exactly say. She should be nice, but not too nice. Girls that are always in a good mood just have something wrong with them. I want a girl with a sense of humor, or who can, at least understand and put up with my humor.

Intelligence is also important. I don’t mean just book smarts, but an understanding of the world in general. I want someone who can evaluate the world and look at it from various points of view. She should be confident in her own thoughts, but be willing to reevaluate opinions based on new information.

And while I generally break things down into those 3 things; looks, personality and intelligence, I know I have more specific things. I need a girl who likes the outdoors. I don’t want some girl who just wants to go to the beach and sit with her book. There’s time for that too, but I’d like to have a girl who is willing to go sailing, hiking and camping as well. I want a girl who will go dancing, but also enjoys a quiet evening in a café. I want a girl who likes a quiet evening in front of a movie as much as going to a party and staying out till 5am. She should be willing to try new things, and be forceful enough to make me try new things. We should be able to plan things together, and flexible enough to be spontaneous with things.

We are all strong and weak. We all have the moments when we are up or down. I need a girl who will lean on me when she needs it, and can be supportive when I need it. I don’t know. I feel like it’s all bs. I want a girl who simply has “that spark.” I want a girl who will be a good mother. I want a girl who can look sexy in jeans and a shirt, without trying, and who can be dead sexy when she wants to be. And she’ll do it just to drive me crazy, and somehow I’ll be able to do the same for her.

I want a girl who can lead, follow and walk beside me. I want a girl who wants to share it all, and discover even more. Does such a girl exist? Damned if I know. I know what I’ve held in my arms. I know the magic I’ve touched and for whatever reasons, it went to a certain point and that’s it. But what I’m after, what I believe we are all after, is the one that brings no boundaries and who is timeless. And so it is she, who is my type of girl.

02.09.06 Frank the Scout

For those of you who know or don't know, I was active in scouting. Most people don't really know what that means. Some thinks that it means you never do anything wrong, and always help little old ladies across the street. I'm not going to go in and debate that, but what I will say, is that I try to live by the points in scouting. I hope when you read these, you see and understand me.

Scout Law

TRUSTWORTHY

A Scout tells the truth. He keeps his promises. Honesty is part of his code of conduct. People can depend on him.

LOYAL

A Scout is true to his family, Scout leaders, friends, school, and nation.

HELPFUL

A Scout is concerned about other people. He does things willingly for others without pay or reward.

FRIENDLY

A Scout is a friend to all. He is a brother to other Scouts. He seeks to understand others. He respects those with ideas and customs other than his own.

COURTEOUS

A Scout is polite to everyone regardless of age or position. He knows good manners make it easier for people to get along together.

KIND

A Scout understands there is strength in being gentle. He treats others as he wants to be treated. He does not hurt or kill harmless things without reason.

OBEDIENT

A Scout follows the rules of his family, school, and troop. He obeys the laws of his community and country. If he thinks these rules and laws are unfair, he tries to have them changed in an orderly manner rather than disobey them.

CHEERFUL

A Scout looks for the bright side of things. He cheerfully does tasks that come his way. He tries to make others happy.

THRIFTY

A Scout works to pay his way and to help others. He saves for unforeseen needs. He protects and conserves natural resources. He carefully uses time and property.

BRAVE

A Scout can face danger even if he is afraid. He has the courage to stand for what he thinks is right even if others laugh at or threaten him.

CLEAN

A Scout keeps his body and mind fit and clean. He goes around with those who believe in living by these same ideals. He helps keep his home and community clean.

REVERENT

A Scout is reverent toward God. He is faithful in his religious duties. He respects the beliefs of others.

Scout Oath

On my honor I will do my best

To do my duty to God and my country

and to obey the Scout Law;

To help other people at all times;

To keep myself physically strong,

mentally awake, and morally straight.

Scout Motto

Be Prepared

Scout Slogan

Do a Good Turn Daily

The Eagle Scout Charge

The foremost responsibility of an Eagle Scout is to live with honor. To an Eagle Scout, honor is the foundation of all character. He knows that "A Scout is trustworthy" is the very first point of the Scout Law for good reason. An Eagle Scout lives honorably, not only because honor is important to him but because of the vital significance of the example he sets for other Scouts. Living honorably reflects credit on his home, his church, his troop, and his community. May the white of the Eagle badge remind you to always live with honor.

The second obligation of an Eagle Scout is loyalty. A Scout is true to his family, Scout leaders, friends, school, and nation. His loyalty to his troop and brother Scouts makes him pitch in and carry his share of the load. All of these help to build the loyalty which means devotion to community, to country, to one's own ideals, and to God. Let the blue of the Eagle badge always inspire your loyalty.

The third obligation of the Eagle Scout is to be courageous. Courage has always been a quality by which men measure themselves and others. To a Scout, bravery means not only the courage to face physical danger, but the determination to stand up for the right. Trusting in God, with faith in his fellowman, he looks forward to each day, seeking his share of the world's work to do. Let the red in the Eagle badge remind you always of courage.

The fourth obligation of an Eagle Scout is to be cheerful. To remind the Eagle Scout to always wear a smile, the red, white, and blue ribbon is attached to the scroll of the Second Class Scout award, which has its ends turned up in a smile.

The final responsibility of an Eagle Scout is service. The Eagle Scout extends a helping hand to those who still toil up Scouting's trail, just as others helped him in his climb to the Eagle. The performance of the daily Good Turn takes on a new meaning when he enters a more adult life continuing service to others. The Eagle stands as protector of the weak and helpless. He aids and comforts the unfortunate and the oppressed. He upholds the rights of others while defending his own. He will always "Be Prepared" to put forth his best.

You deserve much credit for having achieved Scouting's highest award. But wear your award with humility, ever mindful that the Eagle Scout is looked up to as an example. May the Scout Oath and the Scout Law be your guide for tomorrow and onward.

31.05.06

A Day in the Life of this Capristo

If the alarm is set, it goes off at a quarter past 6, just like it the days of old when I used to have to follow my father to the shower. The shower takes about 10 minutes, 5 to shower and 5 to strip/dry off. I have my own sink in my room. I press play to whatever playlist is loaded in winamp and shave. It’s about another 10 minutes to do that, and I’ve finished drying the rest of the way off. It’s time to throw on a pair of pants and maybe the t-shirt of the day before walking down to the kitchen. I nuke some coffee water and then sip it as I finish dressing.

Somewhere between 7 and quarter after I leave for work. If I’m feeling frisky, I’ll take the 25 minutes and walk. Most days it’s a 15 minute bike ride. She’s a weathered older style mountain bike. I can’t make time on her the way I could on the road bike, but she’s all season transportation. We cruise along at a pace that keeps me from turning into a sweaty mess by the time I get to work. Walking is nice if I’ve got the time. I’ll finish waking up before I get to work. I’ll have time to get my thoughts in order for the day and admire the beauty of my surroundings. If it’s raining, I’ll arrive at work a little wet on my thighs, but dry off pretty quick.

I’ll swipe in and walk upstairs. If I’m wearing a jacket or fleece, I’ll hang it up and go around, say good morning and shake everyone’s hand. It’s the standard practice here. If someone has a birthday, or for some reason has some goodies, they’ll be sitting on the counter next to the coffee machine. I go and fire up the computer, get out my notebook and whatever clips of paper I need for the projects I’m in the middle of. About that time it’s time to log on and fire up Outlook. If I’ve gotten any emails over night, I check them out.

If I’ve got samples being built, I’ll go down there to check on the status of things and see what’s going on. If not, I’m in the middle of data up to my elbows with paper scattered across the desk and on top of parts. I’ll wait till 8 if I need to make any calls. If it’s a normal day, I’ve got till about 8:20-8:30 till Erkan and Oliver get in. If they’re there earlier (7:30ish), I know they’re in for a rough day and probably a rough week. I plan accordingly.

Things are a dull roar or full bore. There will be about 10 different things on my plate at once. Some are hot and need to be taken care of asap. Some are things I need to set up with other people and keep track of. The rest are things that are waiting for the 5 minutes I wish I had.

The wholly time is from 9-9:15, break time. Most people bring in bread with something on it or go to the caf. If I’m starving I’ll run out to the caf. If things are running really good and the techs invite me, which they will, I’ll go and eat at the caf with them. Thursday is Leberkäse with eggs and Friday is Bratwurst. I usually work through it. I say screw it, I’ve got too much to do, too little time.

It’ll be a hard push of madness up until lunch. I might have to run out to our large storage area or the main production line. I might be measuring something in the fine measurements lab, or by hand in the small sample storage room. If I need a Mat. Sci guy I will probably be out there to drop off or pick up parts. Towards 11:30 my stomach lets me know what time it is. Jessica and I usually walk over between 12 and 12:30. It usually depends on what we have going on. She’ll probably wait for me if I’m in one of the other areas. We usually go and pick up sandwiches, and take orders for anyone else who wants something. Gitte will probably want a light sandwich or Kit Kat, but not always. Occasionally, when there’s something good, we might eat at the caf.

The afternoon goes by too fast. I haven’t gotten enough done, but I’ll probably burnt out enough. I’ll take it up to somewhere between 5:30 and 6. I’ve had to set 6 as my get your shit together and get out of here time. If I’m in a pinch, it gives me 20 minutes to finish whatever email(s) I need to write and make it out before I go over the legal 10 hour max work day. Those last 20 minutes go by too fast and if I’m in the middle of data I know I have to save and shut down at 6 or I’ll probably be sucked in and go over the time limit. It’s like being back on the race car team, what should have only been another 5 minutes always turned into another hour. The girlfriends never appreciated that, not that I can blame them.

It’ll have been one crazy day. I’ll have had about 10 gears to switch between about as many times as an F1 driver. I’ll still have the wind down; the overlap time takes a while. It’s better when I walk or have to pick up some food. Dinner is always some sort of meat with a side, probably rice or mashed potatoes or I’ll break things up with pasta. Everybody is always dazzled with my cooking, although I maintain that it’s nothing special. I usually make my meat a little crispy/burnt. Not bad, just starting to, like it was cooked on a grill. People are always worried about it, but I tell them it’s perfect.

If it’s a Monday or Wednesday, I’ll probably be playing soccer. Afterwards we’ll all chill in the hallway waiting for each other to cycle through the shower. If it’s a Tuesday or Thursday I might be bowling with a couple of the guys from the sample shop, but we don’t do it every week. I might hang out with Marcel and company, watch a movie, read, write, work in Photoshop, compose a new playlist or go to the internet café. There are always a number of spontaneous things that can happen as well. I can always go to the park or down to the river to sit on a bench in the setting sun.

Somewhere between 11 and 12 I’ll hit the hay. It will most likely be closer to 12. If I go to sleep earlier, I’ll wake up before my alarm.

If it’s the weekend, Friday might be quiet or spontaneous. Most likely, I’m too burnt out to stay out past 1 and will consider the night a success if I’m busy till 11. Unless I stay out past 2 or consume more than 6 drinks, I will begrudgingly wake up somewhere between 8 and 9, if not earlier on my own. King Morningwood will tell me to get up. I am obliged to follow his command, but return promptly to bed and will probably dream till 11. I might have the urge to get up and start the day early, but I remind myself I need to rest up for the night to come.

I’ll get up, go pick up grocery to get me through the rest of the weekend. Everything outside of restaurants and similar establishments is closed on Sunday. I’ll enjoy walking around. If the weather is decent, the scenery will be too. I’ll go check out what’s in the charts, but most of it won’t interest me. I’ll be happier cruising through DVD’s looking for something good on sale. I might walk into one of the toy stores / model shops and check things out. I’ll hit up the clothing stores and do window shopping, just to see if there’s something I like. For the most part, my wardrobe is complete with all the shirts and pants my mother and girlfriends have given me over the years and I won’t see anything I want or need. Saturday night is go out night. Someone is always doing something. Depending on who I’m with, where we are and how things are going, I’ll probably walk home between 1 and 6 if I’m not crashing at someone else’s place. It will take me a maximum of 45 minutes regardless of where I am. Most likely in the 10-15 minute range. It’s always nice to do things that way. The cool night air is always refreshing. If I’m lucky, the stars will be out and I’ll gaze the whole way back.

Sunday will probably start around 12 but can be as early as 10 and as late as 1. I’ll get up, eat something. If the weather is nice, I’ll go outside and read somewhere. If not, I’ll sit on my bed and read or write in my journal. Time goes by so fast with so much going on. I won’t remember it if I don’t keep up with whatever the last two weeks have been like. One week can be hard enough. Most of the kids on my floor go home on the weekend. They trickle in Sunday evening. If there are enough of us around and the weather is right, we’ll go outside and kick the soccer ball around a bit. The rents might call in the evening sometime. I might have laundry to hang up or fold. I won’t be tired enough Sunday night, just as I was too tired Friday night. It will have been a week that went by too fast (weeks start logically with Monday here thus ending with Sunday), but I’ll have a whole new week to look forward to. And that’s the way the days go by. I can indeed feel them flying like a hand out the window in the wind.

20.2.06 So here we are, I haven’t really been up to much, so it’s time for some more of Frank’s random thoughts. Talking to the old man a while back on the phone, I was telling him how I’d been writing what’s become my autobiography. Not because I think that I’m that special, but because I wanted to put all the stuff down on paper before I forget any more of it. I want to have something concrete so that the things that I go “Oh, yeah, I forgot all about that,” are there to read.

Anyway, it’s always nice sharing with the old man, as it is with all the people I’m close with. The old man is more than a father, he’s a best friend as well. Both of the rents are. And like any good friend, it’s great because you know each other and can be constructive while still having a good time. It’s nice having someone that always agrees with you, but that doesn’t help you grow as a person either. There’s nothing to challenge your thoughts, whether you agree with the challenge or not. It’s a good thing to be presented with a different point of view from time to time. Of course it’s a good thing to feel like you’re not all the way out in left field either; center-left will do just fine. I didn’t want to be a white or black sheep, I wanted to be a blue one. Of course the closest I ever came was the Smurf incident on my 5^th birthday. My first incident with blue balls was, well not as bad as any other. Literally. I’ll never get clothes wet again without having washed them first.

So the old man, in his infinite wisdom, reminded me not to beat up the past too much. “Remember you did things for your reasons and knowledge at the time.“ And that’s true. You can always what if yourself to the end of time. It’s interesting to evaluate things. Sometimes I’ve gotten to a point we all get to at times, the “why the f did I do that?” But we all have our reasons.

So why do we do the things we do? I’ve been tossing it around. I think I can only really present the guy perspective. If I knew why women do the things they do I could write a book and get rich. They’ll make it into a movie. Maybe I can get Mel Gibson to play the part of the guy…. In my opinion, guys do the shit they do in the name of wine, women and song. Mostly in the name of wine and women, cause if you have them, the song usually comes along for the ride. If you push the right button, she sings for you. If not, you’re the alcoholic cowboy singing Every Rose Has It’s Thorn. I know that’s technically not a country song, but it makes my point. We’ve got jobs to sustain alcoholism, pimp it for chicks and all the rest of the things we like to do in our spare time. But that’s just the surface, there are lots of situational settings.

First and foremost, you do something because you wanted to. You saw a pretty girl, you said to yourself, “I gotta talk to her,” you went and talked to her. Now to clarify, guys are always thinking with their wieners, our body doesn’t allow us to pump blood down there for that long. But that’s just the example I picked. It was either that or buying a car, and I figured most of you are sick of me talking about cars all the time.

Next case, cause it seemed like a good idea at the time. This one is usually related to wine. It seemed like a good idea to drink 20 ounces of vodka in a 30 minute period of time… however, after another 30 minutes and the next 12 hours, that was obviously the wrong impression. So was mixing 3 beers and 3 tequilas that other time. We learn from our mistakes.

Cause it was the lesser of two evils. The old rock and a hard place. You can work half the time and play the other half, or you can not work and not have any money to play with. Actually, it’s more like a rule of thirds. Sleep doesn’t count as work or play, you need it to do both.

Cause it was the right thing to do. Some people have character. Some people have the guts to do the unfavorable thing, but the thing they know is right in their heart. Sometimes you knowingly let your balls get kicked in. You can see it coming, but you don’t turn, you don’t guard yourself, you take one for the team – the hard way. Sometimes you gotta do it to stay true to yourself, and to those around you.

Cause it wasn’t worth the risk. Maybe you were just too comfortable, maybe you were contempt with everything you already had. Maybe you had too much responsibility to other people.

Cause it was a dream come true. I think one of the worst things someone can do, is turn down their dreams. Sometimes, yeah, it has to happen. Sometimes you have to choose between two dreams. But when you’ve got a real chance, when it’s starring you right in the face, sometimes you gotta take it.

Just for the f of it, - Diet Coke. Well, hopefully something more worthy than diet Coke. Maybe some real coke, you know, none of that clear or lightweight stuff. Just the plain old fashion mixture from that classic formula. None of that Wegmans crap, no straws, mirrors or playing cards required. Just because why not, that’s why. To be or not to be, - just for the f of it.

Cause you don’t give a flying…. That would be the mile high club if you did. But hey, there are those times when we are so caught up in emotion, that we say that. Whether it’s hurt or frustration, it tends to be one of the two. Maybe you really just have no preference to the situation, but that nagging someone keeps nagging and you snap.

Cause it was the best you could do with what you had. Hopefully you’re not saying this about the love of your life. Maybe your mother in law. In either case, whether in extreme honesty or not, it may indeed reflect more about you than them. But to be serious, life, as with most things in life, is a compromise. You don’t get something for nothing. I don’t care if you’re rich, have the love of your life or don’t.

I will relate this to racing for just one moment. In racing, there is what is known as the traction circle. Accelerating is towards the top of the page, decelerating is down, cornering left and right point left and right, just like your IQ was normal. No reverse polar notation here. Now you can have pure acceleration, straight out towards the top of the page, pure cornering is left or right (they call that lateral acceleration) and downwards is, yes, you’ve got it, pure deceleration. In between each direction is a ratio between them. Some circles are larger than others, the vehicle more capable. The point being that you can only have so much in one way. What you give up in cornering you keep in braking. It takes great skill to drive around the circle at the edge of it for any given track. You’re limited by your skill, the car and the conditions on the track. Still if you know me, I used to do the best I could with the old Breeze, at every location and it was more than enough to keep most praying to the god of their choice.

Lastly I’ll wrap it up with cause it would be cool. Damn the consequences, sometimes you can see it and how much fun it’s going to be. You don’t care what it costs, what you have to do. For those 5 seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, years or decades, something are worth it all.

And if nothing else ladies, cause we men are always trying to prove to each other who metaphorically has the bigger phallic. Act like you don’t care, but we know size matters as much as knowing how to use it. It’s all about that traction circle thing I was just talking about; you just know it as the oh-or-no circle.

I’ve never been one who liked to answer the question, describe yourself, what are your characteristics. I suppose it’s because I want to be modest, too modest. I can remember on at least one occasion where people told me, damn, we didn’t know how much you did around here till you were gone. Ill be the first to admit, its hard sometimes, but good as well. I know the things I’ve done, but I don’t want to be like I’m your daddy. So I’m going to try to present my views on thing, maybe input a little commentary from things people have told me and let you decide who I am.

14.2.06 With recent events being what they are, my moving out and what not, I decided to write a little bit about my view on politics. I'm not going to talk about government. We all know what most of them aspire to be, but the comment I will make, is that most people only want to see things their way, or think that their way is the best way and there are just too many different kinds of life to do that. So I find most people to be no better than the politicians.

But to talk about my real topic, well, I found out a couple weeks beforehand that my rent would go up by 33% which would then take up close to half of my take home pay. I'd been asking about it since we found out about the renovation back in October. There were didn't knows and the response that it was to remain affordable to students. So with short notice, I was faced with the choice of having to try and afford high rent for a month while I looked for something else, or getting something else. Luckly, with the help of Siemens, I was able to come with what will be a solution that is the lesser of two evils. Still the timing has been poor and my landlord didn't seem too heart broken when I said I had to move out. So, does she already have people lined up and didn't mind putting me to the wind? I don't know for sure, so I can't say one way or another. But it got me to thinkin. Most people do what's right by them. I can't afford it, I'm moving out. I'll move into the new place, see what it's like, if I feel like staying long term and if not, I'll move. Of course we've all had significant others, some we broke up with some that broke up with us. We've all had our reasons. And I left Bausch after a great experience there, twice, but I was always honest and up front with my intentions as best I knew them and I tried to make sure they got as much from me as I did from them, that it was win-win for both sides. And I try not to hold things against people. We are who we are, no one is perfect. Some try to do things the right way, and regardless if they screw it up or not, at least their intentions and heart are in the right place. Some people don't give a rats behind, and some are out there trying to cause trouble. And I suppose there are those who just don't have a clue. But that's life. You take the dice an you roll. I coulda bailed a long time ago, but I liked where I was, so I kept rolling, prepared to do what I had to. It wasn't the end of devil 505 till it was time to punch out. So I am, in true Capristo style. It's going to be action packed, things are lined up, one on top of the next. Spring is right around the corner, but first it'll be time to do a little skiing. I love every single one of my host families, and I hope I've done it right by them.

Dec. 05

I think we all have something inside of us. Something that doesn’t change. We change with time, granted, we mold our experiences and are in turn remolded by them. I’ve seen some of my closest friends grow into something I hadn’t seen five years ago. They’re still the same people deep down, some are still the people I knew 10, 15 years ago, but older and wiser. And in that time, we’ve lived. We’ve done things no one, not even ourselves expected or thought we’d do. And that’s the interesting part about life. There are chances, there are chances to find new things we never knew existed.

We find different parts of ourselves. It’s difficult sometimes. The times when you feel so alone you don’t know what you’re doing, where you question every thing that has brought you to the present moment. It’s not that you’re uncertain, that you’re right or you’re wrong. It’s just a look inside, it’s the self check to make sure you are who you want to be, that you’re doing what you should be. It’s a difficult thing, it’s always a difficult time, but you’re strong and you’ll make it through just fine. The moon, the tide, the seasons, they all wax and wane, but if you know where they are, you know where they’re going to be. You know there’ll be snow in the hills, but that doesn’t prepare you for the beauty of it all the next time you see it, not even for the ten thousandth time.

And love is like that. You’ll have seasons where it seems like you’re on the out with it, but there is love year round. The smell of the melting snow in the first spring days, the sun and the wind on your face in the summer, the first frost of fall with the smell of changing leaves, and white beauty of winter with hot coco in hand and a wood fire burning in the stove. It goes on this way, the same things but new things. You may know me, but you’ll always see something new. 2005 is on it’s way out, it’s been a stellar year, so here’s to old tricks and something new.

-Who is this Frank Guy -

To start with, well, regardless of who people are, we are all people. We all have dreams, things that make us happy and sad, things that we are interested in and so on. Those are the foundation blocks relationships can be built on. I don’t care about age, sex, color, or whatever else you want to list out. I don’t care if you never graduated from school or have a PhD. If you’ll step into my analogy for a minute, we are all rock climbers. Some are going to climb hills with a shallow grade, good hand holds, something that might be considered easy, something you could just about walk up. Others are going to climb the most impossible slopes. But we’re all climbers, and I will talk with anyone on an eye to eye level, as an equal or better until I have a reason not to, until I’m disappointed with garbage that comes out of some peoples mouths.

I’m in no hurry to get to the end of life, only in a hurry to make the most of it, to pack every second, every minute, every day and so on with as much as possible so that I can look back and say yeah, I didn’t waste a dime. Time goes by too fast. I may never get to see and do everything, but there’s no reason why I can’t fill it with as many quality moments as possible. Things can be planned out or spontaneous, just so long as things happen.

I’m a situational kinda guy. Everything depends on what’s going on. As an engineer, I’d say it depends on constraints, the type of load being applied, and how something is constructed. You can have the same load, same constraints, but a completely different construction is going to give you a completely different kind of answer. You can see this in my driving. When I’m out on a race course, it’s on, ride the limit. We are all crazy idiots willingly risking our own necks. If I’m alone on a back road, well, it’s not quite as close, you have to factor in the fact that someone could be around every corner not expecting you on the limit to come roaring through. When I’ve got people in the car with me, well, I have a responsibility to them, to get them to wherever we’re going safely. Now every now and then someone will say make some time, show us what you got and I’ll open it up, but not like I would when I’m alone. And there’s normal driving. With some people, you can’t drive like a rapped ape. When I’m in someone else’s car, it’s my job to bring it back without a scratch. If I’m in traffic, I owe it to everyone else to control my urges to a dull roar. You can’t screw around too much when there are mommies driving their kids around. You’ll find me doing the same stuff on the ski slopes, sprinting in a kayak or shell across a lake or leaning out over the side of a sailboat to try and get the most out of it. I’ve always been curious, they should have named me George, but it’s not too hard to see that I became an engineer because I wanted to know how to make my own toys, and make to go closer to their limits, to make them reset limits. That was the answer to that situation.

I love to laugh. Its usually related to my mind being in the gutter, but I like to play off things too. I don’t care if you’re having the worst day of my life, you gotta try and find humor in things, in yourself. If I do something dumb, that doesn’t really affect anyone else, I’m going to be like geez dumbass, what did you do that for. Focker. And I’ll answer my self in a retard voice, cause I’m stupid. I’ll think on Multiplicity or something funny and think “Sorry Steve, that legs gonna have to come off.” And then I’ll be like awe fuck it, and make it better, make it work. At the same time, I don’t like to let other people down. That hits a spot that ends me. I believe in family and friends. I believe in honor and if I screw up and damage any of that, then I don’t pass go, don’t collect $200 and go straight to hell.

My nonchalance (fancy word for not being picky) drives people nuts some times. What do you want to drink…? Well, if I can be happy with any of the choices it’s kinda eh, whatever, whatever you’re having. Some call that indecisiveness, but in cases like the one here, it’s the wrong application for the word. I also have this thing were I don’t want to cause too much trouble or make people go out of their way for me. I’m eternally grateful when they do, and hope I can show that one way or another.

I like to test and push myself. I like to say ok kid, lets see what you got. It’s a big motivator and I think that’s one of the reasons I used to procrastinate with school work, that and the aforementioned quality moments. I loved putting my 6x9 journal entries off until about the last night or two before they were do. I had it calculated out, about how fast I could do them, and I’d time it so that it would be an all-nighter, a do or die moment, no screw ups allowed night. I’d chew mint, crank the tunes and jam through the night. I’d get an 8.5/9 and laugh myself silly. People would look at me in amazement or get perturbed because they had done 4 or 5 a week the whole quarter, and spent more time on it and gotten the same grade, or perhaps a 9 but still couldn’t believe it. I like to be busy, I like to be doing stuff, I will find something to do.

I like to use my noodle. I like to think, evaluate, invent, create, build, but also philosophical. I’m going to look at history, its examples, its experience and try and apply that. I try to restrain from thinking with my penis, or at least a completely uninhibited one. Most of the time, when you let your penis lead you, someone slams the door on it and that’s no fun. So if I may consult others, just to double check my own thoughts, to make sure I’ve evaluated every perspective. No one comes up with everything, inspiration and genius can be sparked from the damedest places. And above all else, no one is right all the time.

I bow down and worship the under dog. I love it when the guy no one thought could do it, comes out of no where and dazzles everyone. I love it when people accomplish stuff that others said couldn’t be done. I think I identify it. If you don’t want me to do something, you better be able to rationalize it, cause telling me not to is just like waving the flag in front of the bull.

I try to be a gentleman. I think they are the last of a dying breed. Its tough these days, you got women who don’t want you to hold doors for them, or think you’re hitting on them if you do. You got your boys always trying to get you laid. Not that I mind the help, but people gotta understand, I have my own terms and standards and I’m going to stick by them. And there’s more to it than that, but yeah, I try to be, I’ve been known as and well, yeah.

Now to go along with that, I think most would agree than I’m a romantic. Over the years, I’ve been a poet and one to know how to treat a lady once I got her. There are at least a few out there that still remember the times we spent together, in the best of ways and so I think I must have done something right.

And When I´m not out going crazy, I like to go camping, backpacking or just somewhere where I can lay out and look at the stars. I might bring a pen and paper to sketch with. Besides the usual rock, I like film scores. I like stuff with drive in it, that could just carry you into the wind and make you feel like you had a rocket strapped to your back. I like the stuff that makes you feel that no matter what, you can do it, you´re going to do it. And I like some of the softer stuff that carries you off.

There are a lot of sides to me. I have a lot of interests. Some people are surprised that I became an engineer, but that´s out of the context they knew me. I´m a jack of all trades kinda guy, and I´ve mastered a few along the way. I´ve been called a renaissance man for it. And somewhere in there, I make my mark. I think I´m the kinda guy people will always remember. The guy who was a good guy, worked hard, did a good job and lived as well. Someone who would not walk in front of you, not behind you, but be by your side, call it the way he saw it. Someone who wasn´t too scared to push himself or try new things, but smart enough to look at the whole picture, to consider others as well as himself.

So there it is. I hope my head isn´t too big, that I haven´t exaggerated too much. To those of you who don´t know me but managed to find the site, that´s me trying to look in mirror, but show you what´s rolling around behind the eyeballs as well.